Fast Forward

It's been nearly 9 years since my last post. Wow, have things changed!

I'm not sure why I stopped posting to my blog. It was most likely a number of reasons. It wasn't until I received an email letting me know a new comment was left that I even remembered I had one! I sat  here reading most of the posts I had written and I was taken back to those dark days.

Wes was three and off to Preschool. Casey was a toddler and my days were filled with so much stress and anxiety. There was still so much of the unknowns and the what-ifs. What if he didn't progress much farther than he already was? What if he couldn't handle school and the extra expectations that came with it? What if he had to live with us the rest of his life?

All that is gone. There is still stress and some anxiety. I won't lie about that. It's been replaced with new anxieties as my sons move up the ladder of life, explore new opportunities, and begin their social circles. Wesley is now 13 and Casey is 11. Both in middle school. MIDDLE SCHOOL?? How did that even happen?

With hard work, determination, and a can do attitude, that's how! Wesley flourished in school. He had an amazing team at his back the whole way. He reached higher than we ever imagined. He participated in so many school activities, including theater! We all worked hard to push him forward and get him to where he is today.

Casey is more amazing than we thought possible. He loves theater, and has entered into the world of sports and girls. Insert wide eye emoji here! He is his brothers biggest supporter and friend. I look back on a post where I questioned whether this would even be possible, and I scoff at my former self. How could I even think that Casey would ever give up on him? It's remarked to Tim and I constantly how wonderful Casey is and how he talks about his brother with such admiration and love. He helps Wesley any and every chance his is needed. I am just so lucky to have the boys that I have.

The boys will be completing their first season of wrestling for the middle school. That's right, my son is a wrestler! Not only that, but he's also a cross country runner and a track and field wonder! He has taken on sports with such gusto and we love that he's included in these activities. Not only that, but he's good! I mean freaking good! Who knew??

As for me, I've changed so much over these 9 years. I started volunteering in the boys classrooms, moved on to substitute teaching and now I'm a para educator in the same preschool my boys attended. The very same one that gave my son the shove forward on his road to greatness! 

I think I'm going to keep up with this blog again, even if no one reads it. I want to keep track of my boys accomplishments because they need to be treasured and it seems these days, writing them down is the only way I remember!

Hello Floor. Meet Nose.

Life with boys is interesting at best and frustrating at worst. Boys are rough, tough, and very active. I'm finding it not easy to relate to their little world. The bright spot is, having a little brother when you have autism is a blessing. Casey will not give up on his older brother when it comes to playing. He adapts to Wes' playing habits and that's not always a good thing.

It was a busy morning Saturday. We were planning on trying to get rid of some old stuff in a yard sale. That didn't go so well. While we were cleaning up, Casey was trying to get in his brothers face and Wes was not happy. He shoved Casey hard and Casey's poor little face met the hardwood floor hard. He immediately started screaming which was a good sign. I scooped him up and noticed his little nose was already showing signs of swelling and broken blood vessels. It was slightly bleeding, but not gushing. Off to Urgent Care we go!

We had no time to prep Wes for what was happening so I should have known what was ahead of us. He was MAD! He threw a huge meltdown outside while Tim was trying to get him out of the car. Meanwhile, I was running in with Casey who seemed too calm for someone who smashed his nose on the floor.

Two and a half hours later and about 4 meltdowns, no broken nose. Just very badly bruised. My poor little man. Do you think that he learned his lesson? Nope. While in the waiting room, he started on his brother, nearly hitting his face again.

When parent's have boys, you should be able to keep a running tab at the Emergency room.

It's been too long

Wow, I've certainly neglected this blog. It wasn't my intention, but you know how life can be. You get so caught up that you forget the little things.

Life has been eventful in the last couple months, I'm not sure where to start..

The milk free diet has been going well. It's still in the infancy stage in terms of finding foods that not only he will eat, but that are dairy free too. Sometimes, when planning meals for the week, we forget to check our normal menus to make sure they are dairy free or can be prepared dairy free. We have not found a milk substitute that he will drink at meals. He will not drink soy, almond, or rice milk, that's any flavor. He will drink his EO-28 Splash so that is helping him with calcium and vitamin D. Wes has had a follow up with the gastro this past week and he was surprised and very pleased that the diet has worked so well with his constipation. We are pleased as well.

Wes' behavior has not gotten any better in the last few months either. It's progressively gotten worse. He can no longer tolerate any changes, even those he's been prepared for. Transitions are, once again, very difficult for him. We've gone back to PECS all the time as well as reinforcers to help him get over the rough times. The school consultant also recommended buying the handheld version of the V-Smile that he can work towards when we're out and about and he's having a hard time. So far, it's working, but we still have issues.

Casey has been following in his older brothers footsteps. His behavior has been pretty bad lately too. I know he's just trying to get attention because we've been so focused on Wes' behavior and correcting that. I set aside some time during the week for just he and I to do special things. We go to the library to read books, visit a park we don't normally go to, and have special treats. He will be starting preschool in the fall as well, so that should help a lot. He really loves to play with other kids and we don't go on playdates because they are just too difficult.

Wes will be starting his summer program next week and I've included a playgroup two days a week for him. It's a social skills playgroup. They are ABA trained and will include mainstreamed kids. He's on the cusp of wanting to join in with other kids. He just needs to learn the skills to get him over that first hurdle.

For the moment, that's all.

Sweet relief

I don't know why, but I am still amazed that this is working. Maybe it's because I didn't want to think it would work. I thought the effort would be more then the pay off, but I was wrong. I can just see the relief on Wes' face when he goes. Some days he's going twice! No more stomach distention, no more struggling, and no more constipation! He did have one issue where I found a small streak of blood in his diaper. He had gone earlier that day without a problem. He seemed fine, but was a bit read. While at the playground, he kept grabbing at his rear end like he had a wedgie. I adjusted his pull-up (yes, we're back to those) and sent him off to play again. After 5 more minutes, he came over to me and said "I hurt". He's never said those words to me but I wanted to take him serious. I packed the kids back up and we headed home so I could change Wes. That's when I discovered the blood. I immediately called the pediatrician and the nurse told me to keep an eye out and if it happened again, to bring him in. I know he has to have some irritation left over from the constipation. It could be small hemorrhoids or some left over tears from all the struggling. I just hope my baby is okay.

I've purchased two books and borrowed two from our lending library on potty training. I am determined to have this boy potty trained by the end of summer. My goal, as huge as it sounds, is to have both boys trained by the end of summer. Lord, give me strength.

Things are looking good

I know it's still too early to tell, but things are looking real good. So far, even after the last slip up, he has consistently gone once a day. He did not go on Tuesday because he went late Monday night when he was in bed. Like clockwork, he went the next day. His eliminations still seem to be a bit too hard, but I'm not sure. They could be normal for him. All I know is that he's going and he doesn't seem to be having any gas issues or distention in his belly.
Not sure if this is a coincidence, but his speech has improved slightly. His behavior, however, has not. He hit me the other day and I looked him right in the eye and told him that I would not tolerate hitting and he is to keep his hands to himself. I then turned my back on him. Within 20 seconds he said "I'm sorry. Give me a hug big guy!". I was floored. I gave him a big hug, told him that I loved him and gave him a big kiss. Just today, Casey asked to watch something on t.v. so I turned it on for him. Wesley came up to me and said "I don't want to watch this." Again, floored! He's even seeking me out to ask to go upstairs and play in his room. Like I said, not sure if it's a coincidence or maybe it's something more.
It's still a struggle to find things for him to eat. He's more willing to take bites of foods if there is a reward offered. I'm not thrilled with the idea, but if it gets him to eat a more variety of foods, then I guess it's what we have to do...for now..

Works in progress

It's been an interesting couple of days. Of course, Easter was here so it didn't leave me a whole lot of time to blog. I did keep track of what's been going on with Wes though.

On Saturday, he eliminated twice. Each time was pretty mushy and had a strong odor. On Sunday, he eliminated twice again and this time it was more formed, but still soft. He had had no milk since Thursday. During the chaos of Easter, pizza was ordered. We've given Wes pizza and scraped off the cheese, sauce and any toppings. He seems to be fine as long as there is no dairy in the pizza. Well the pizza that was ordered yesterday contained milk ( I didn't look it up and he was so hungry). So far, he's eliminated and it looked similar to yesterday except maybe slightly more formed. Easily passable though. We'll have to wait and see what the pizza does to him.

His behavior is still very defiant. I talked with the autism teacher on Friday and she seems to think that he's going through the two year old stage that he never went through. He's more aware of choices and his likes and dislikes. It's a good thing, but I still want him to understand that his behavior is not okay and that he needs to use his words to make his choices known instead of tantrums.

In the meantime, we're hanging in there and waiting for vacation next week.

Accidents Happen

Wes is in the middle of a constipation cycle. He was given goldfish crackers on Monday and accidentally given cheese on Tuesday. He still isn't eating well on the new foods. I did get him to take a whole EO-28 Splash yesterday so that's good. I took a trip to a natural market in another city and found some cereal bars that are very similar to Nutri-Grain bars that he loved. These are much healthier though. I also found some vegan fake cheddar cheese crackers that I'm hoping to substitute for the goldfish that he's addicted to.

I've been giving him Miralax to help move him along, but we're on day 4 now. I'm dreading when he finally does go because I know it's going to be painful to pass. Yesterday, he was having some gassy cramping. I could tell because his face would scrunch up and then he'd run, hide and sit in the catchers stance until it passed. I feel so bad for him. I wish I could figure this out.

So today, we start fresh. Absolutely no dairy and hopefully that will work. I'm considering starting him on Super Nu-Thera from Kirkman's labs but worried about him getting too much. Maybe we should stop the EO-28 Splash because that's actually a meal substitute. Any advice on that front would be helpful.

Yesterday, Wes had a follow up appointment with the Genetics counselor and he noticed these pimple like things on his chest and his neck. He thought they were something called Molluscum Contagiosum. So off to the pediatrician to double check and sure enough, that's what he has. What else can this child possibly go through! If you've never heard of it, I highly suggest you read it because it could happen to your child.