Tuesday, May 27, 2008

At my wits end

All bloggers out there, I need your help. I'm at my wits end with this issue and I'm not sure what else I can do.
Wes is spitting. Not saliva spit, but spitting water. He takes a big swig from his cup, and then lets it dribble out all over himself, soaking his clothes. He used to do this last summer (hhmmm, maybe there's a clue) but stopped when he started school. So far we've limited his cup use, put him in time out, he can only drink in front of us, made him keep his cup on the kitchen table, but nothing is working.
Today, after he finished his water, he stole Casey's cup and used that to spit. Do I have to take Casey's cup from him too? He only does it when we aren't looking, which drives me crazy because he's being sneaky and I can't watch him at all times. Is he doing it because he knows we will get upset? I give him as much attention as I possibly can, is he looking for more?
Someone help me. I was so angry with his actions that I sent him straight to his room after lunch. He knows I'm angry. I can tell in his face and it kills me that he sees me in that light. I know it shouldn't, I'm Mom after all.
I'll take any advice anyone has.

4 comments:

Casdok said...

Um where shall i start!
I think you need to determin if its sensory

http://www.sensory-processing-disorder.com/sensory-processing-disorder-checklist.html

or behavioural.
You need to know specifics about when, where, how, etc. about his spitting. Does he do it in all settings? Does he do it at certain times of the day? Does he do it during certain activities? Does he do it when specific people are around? Does he seem to be doing it to get attention? Some of things I'd suggest you think about are: Does he spit in certain locations? Does he like to do it into wind or sunlight? (This causes neat rainbows!) Does he like to watch it fall? (Seeing if it always takes the same amount of time?) Does he have a fasination with other oral or visual stimuli? Does the spitting seem to be self-satisfying? Once you have some possible theories as to why he is spitting, you can come up with ways to change that behavior. If he is spitting to "see rainbows in the sunlight" you might try giving him other things with which he can get similar results such as dishsoap, bubbles or a prism. If he is spitting only during certain activities, he is probably trying to tell you he is bored or he doesn't like the activity (or perhaps he loves it). If that's the case, you need to consider an activity change. If you think he is doing it for the oral or visual pleasure he receives, you might try teaching him a time and/or a place where spitting will be acceptable 100% of the time. You might try providing other things that provide oral/visual stimulation. Keep in mind that frequently if you try to fully eliminate a behavior, you will find yourself with another one that is more annoying. Teaching small, acceptable "variations on a theme" or teaching "times and places that are okay" are usually more viable options.

Good luck!

Anonymous said...

Does Wesley get his shirt changed when it is wet? I agree with casdok, it needs to be determined whether or not it is sensory or behavioral. He may like the feel of being wet, or he may like the reaction he gets from you when he does it.
I asked our speech therapist at school and she wondered if he likes being wet or the feel of the water dripping down his chin. She suggested that maybe you give him an appropriate time/place to do it like in the tub when he gets his bath. Maybe if you ignore the behavior and don't react to it, he will stop because he isn't getting your attention.
What made him stop doing it last summer?
He is a smart little guy and probably knows exactly what he is doing and why!
Diane

Jessica said...

He started chewing on his blanket again too so I'm thinking there's a sensory thing going on here. It's not so much that he spits, but he lets the water run out of his mouth, down his chin and soaks his clothes. I change his clothes when I notice he's done it. Both Tim and I have tried talking to him and telling him that the behavior is not okay. I think it's part sensory and part he knows we don't like it. His dentist mentioned that his molars would be coming in soon and that's about the time the blanket chewing started. That could be it too. We have a chewy tube, but he doesn't seem to like it. I guess we just casually deal with it until it stops.

Lynn Stallworth said...

My guys LOVE these things called Jigglers. Have you ever tried those? Mine have lots of oral sensory issues. They are blanket chewers as well. They are so oral, in fact, that they both have tiny chips in a tooth or two from nibbling on things they shouldn't be. It's a constant battle in our house to keep things out of their mouths that shouldn't be there. The bath idea was a great one.

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